WHAT’S NEXT?

Sometimes I hate that question. Sometimes I even hate asking myself that:

What’s next?

            It’s like I’m dreading the future or something. But still, sometimes I just can’t help it. It goes as naturally as the air that I breathe.

So, what’s next??

After T left, things have gone back to…normal. Rather flat and dull, but still tolerable. It’s okay, I guess.

How are things at home lately?

It’s still the same, I’m afraid. The Great King is still somewhere in ‘the realm of the unknown’. The Mighty Queen is exhausted. She’s started having that sad, familiar look on her face again.

The Sweet Prince is enjoying his first, real job. (I guess so. He looks that way to me.) I notice that he has also started seeing a girl he’s not ready to reveal yet.

Well, that’s okay. At least he’s got something (or in this case, someone) to distract him from reality these days.

The First Princess is coping with her own reality as well. Her husband is still Mr.Narcissistic Sociopath. Despite how messed-up both parents are (although sadly, I must say that the father is worse!), the kids are alright. Gira-ku is turning one next year in January. She’s such a beautiful baby girl.

Me? As usual, I drown myself mostly in work and writing. Sometimes I maintain my social life by hanging out with friends or attending some affordable events in town. I try to stay sane despite my very, very busy schedule lately. (And no, I’m not giving up writing because of that. Never again!)

Since that writing workshop and hanging out with T again, my mind is completely made up. I’m building my writing career even more seriously now. No more delays – and I don’t care whatever it takes and if other people disagree with my decisions. This is my life and I am entitled to do whatever I want with it.

Anyway, Okeu is moving back to Bandung next month. Gigi’s asking me when I’m not too busy to hang out with her and I really do want to. I miss hanging out with her and it’s been a while.

I’m afraid that my friendship with the girls T and I both know is kind of in a strain. I can just sense it. So far, I’m pretty much okay with them but one. No need to mention any names here, though.

I might write about her on a separate entry; I might not. It all depends on my mood. All I can say for now is that I’ve moved on from the past. It’s sad that she’s chosen to stay there. Too bad.

R.

 

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